An inseparable tandem.
In my heart, lies a man who would love me until the end of time.
School events are coming. :>
Heyy. Our sembreak will begin soon. Yay. But only three days, though. Urgh.

I'm actually excited for the United Nations and Halloween Party on Wednesday & Thursday.

U.N. : We'll be having those booths in each nation. Our country is China. (Lol!! Melamine!!). And we'll be having this parade. At the same time, we will play games against the red section, I think.
Halloween : We'll leave 'round 5:30!!! Haha. And of course, party. I think we'll go to the mall. Then go back to school. Weee!

---

I don't know what to wear on U.N. or Halloween. Because I think we're going to have our living rosary at the same time, U.N. So I guess we have to wear our uniforms. Plus, we have to wear our P.E. uniforms during the games. :| I hope they allow us to wear civilian. Lol. But in case they will allow us, I'm going to wear what Hannah gave me on my birthday. (:

Halloween? Well, I'm planning to wear the t-shirt that ella will buy me. Although, she hasn't bought it yet. Hopefully, she'll buy it before time runs out. Lol!! But if she's not able to buy it, I guess I'll buy what I bought for myself last Saturday during my celebration. Haha.

---

Really excited! I bet we'll have lots of fun. Obviously! Haha. And I hope I'll get a chance to hang out with my grade 4 friends during those two events. Urgh! We're suppose to have the mini fair together with the U.N. but it was cancelled. They told us that the mini-fair will be next year. But I guess it's alright. Haha. I know we'll still have fun without those booths. But I was excited when I heard about the mini-fair. ): I guess I need to have patience. Lmao.

To Gooseans, I hope you have good decoration and have fun!! (:

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Posted on Monday, October 27, 2008 at 3:51 PM.
I wish I may, I wish I might.
Birthday wishlist. I don't know whether it's too late or not. But whatever.=)

• A new phone. Any would do. :)) :|
• iPod nano. :>
• At least 10 t-shirts. Haha! I <3 'em.
• Ankle sprain would be gone.
• Higher graders. LMAO.
• To join a lot of quiz-bees for the Festival.
• Flipflops.
• Shutter shades (Oh my! I really want them.)
• That Ninoy Aquino shirt.
• Hensen (wtf? =)) )
• Cake. :DD

OKAYY, I don't know if all those in my wishlist will be granted. Haha! And I guess that's enough. I don't really need all of those in the first place. #10 in my wishlist is a must-have! =))

And I really want to have higher grades plus my ankle sprain to be gone. :|

HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! \:D/

(&& I want a box of krispy kreme).
[I really wanted a new phone, though]

HAHAHA!

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Posted on Sunday, October 26, 2008 at 12:41 PM.
Last words of an 11 year old
As the say it, time flies so fast.

After all those memories that happened, in just a few more hours, I will be turning 12. It was really nice being an 11-year-old. Even though I was 11, I still felt like being a kid. But now that I'm going to be twelve, do you think I can still feel what a kid feels?

Most definitely! Even a grandma can still be a kid somewhat.

First, I was this new born child. And now I'm about to graduate from Elementary and soon to step on the grounds of High School. Sometimes I tell myself, "Why is time so fast?". And I feel like crying. If only you can rewind back all those sweet moments you had with your special friends. That would be the best.

But I know that I can't make time go slowly. Sometimes you need a little speed, right? And I know that those memories we had will never be forgotten. All those times of laughter and times of sadness. All unforgettable moments that we've cherished.

And I also know that even if we can't go back to the past, we can still gain happiness in the future. We failed together and we kept moving forward. And I know that we will succeed in the future together. Because we will be stuck together even if we get crushed into bits.

This day is very special to me. Even if my birthday is really tomorrow, a day before your birthday is special too. I never thought that I would have fun despite those problems, those school work and most of all those people who make you sick. And I am very blissful that I've met these girls. At first, we were strangers who were interested in making friends, and then we end up laughing with each other for no practical reason at all.

I don't know how I will judge myself. Did I grow up as a brat? Or what? But I guess I grew up fine. Unlike others, I think I am differently raised. That's because I'm eccentric.
I thank the people who brighten up my day. I thank you all for making this world a better place for me and everyone else. I thank you for making me smile whenever I feel sad. Thank you for being here for me always. And I thank God for giving me a chance to meet people like you guys. Love you so much!

All I want to say is, I hope my birthday will be a fun day. And I hope that I will stay being a kid forever! Even if I turn into a grandma, I still want to be holding my hands with my best friends.

11 years have passed and she's still acting like an insane li'l kiddo.
:)

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Posted on Saturday, October 25, 2008 at 8:38 PM.
Killer clumsiness.
Well, I'm clumsy from the very start. Don't you know?

So today, I borrowed my mom's cellphone and I brought it to school because I needed it to take pictures for the photo journalism. And then, during our lunch break, I said I was going to take a picture for a second. And my hand was slippery that time. So when I reached the phone from my pocket, it slipped down from my hand. It jumped. Lol. I mean, tumalsik. When I grabbed the phone from the ground, its screen was broken. Basta, nabasag. And I was like "shiiiiiit!!".

My mom got mad. She screamed on my face. And yeah, ANG CLUMSY KO TALAGA! :||

Hate it.

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Posted on Tuesday, October 21, 2008 at 7:39 PM.
No, it's not too late to apologize.
He apologized.

YES NAMAN. WAITING FOR IT. I mean, he already did. He apologized last Friday. Remember? I thought he apologized but he doesn't love me anymore. But then, he text-messaged me only this Saturday. (Oct 18). He said 'Sorry' again. And of course, I accepted it and I told him that he should remember that I love him so much.

You know what he replied? (Ahh, oke). That made me feel that it's true, he doesn't love me anymore. While texting, I wasn't saying any "haha" or "lol". Oh yeah, I did. I said "Ohh. Haha."

Then he told me that he'll tell me something. And I asked him what was it. Guess what! He told me (in tagalog + english) "Urghh. Ito nalang.. Wait.. Um.. i love you. haha^^". Exactly like that! :PP

And man! I melted that time. Well, I was talking to Paolo on the phone when he texted so I was like telling Paolo that I was kinikilig. :)) And he was like "yeee". LMAOO.

And of course, I replied. Well, duh. I said "Ageh! Nakakatakot! Love you too. :)" HAHA. Yep, a cheesy and funny way, eh? :))

He also told me that he wants to talk to me in school. Tuesday, tomorrow! Lol. OHH. He told me (yesterday) that he's going to teach me how to play the guitar. Damn. :)) Well, it's not that I don't want to, actually I want to know how to play the guitar. He asked me if I want to, and I said yes. Blah blah blah. By the tree daw. :)) Whoo, tomorrow! Ngee. Lol.

Aah, whatever. Just happy to know that he still loves me. :)

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!

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Posted on Monday, October 20, 2008 at 7:35 PM.
Too many weaknesses.
Last Thursday, October 16, I fell down and cried.

Why? (Okay. I know it seems different that I cried but I just can't take it anymore.)

I cried because I fell down. Literally, yes. Because I was running towards the flag pole. My right foot twisted. Uhh, it's really hard to explain. I apologize. I'm not good of a story-teller.

Natapilok ako.
To make the story short.

So yeah. I was like "aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh !&@(#*". I kept on cursing that time. Sorry, sorry. But I just can't help but to do such a thing. I mean, it really hurt. For the second time, this time it hurt much more than the first. No idea why. But I think the difference between the two is that, the first one, my right foot twisted like in the front portion and this time, my foot twisted in the side part. Uhh, apologies, it's really confusing. Last time, I didn't fall. Actually I was able to sit and rest. This time, I fell. I lyed on the ground. Even my head touched the ground. I cried. I was whining, too. Paolo & Divino even laughed at me while I was crying. Harhar.

I guess I cried because of me being weak. I really thought I was strong. But then again, I truly am weak.

While crying, Ella and others tried to comfort me. They were saying.. Clarisse, kaya mo 'yan! Matapang ka. And I was so melodramatic and I was saying in reply, "'Yon nga eh, 'yon ang akala ko. Pero hindi pala. :((". Tss. It's so dramatic it makes me laugh. ((:

Or maybe that wasn't the only reason why tears were falling down on my face. Maybe it was also because of him. He was there that time. Playing that silly ol' sport, Basketball with his friends. Abraham even asked me this mysterious yet funny question. I said, "Abraham, napilay ako ulit. Umiyak ako." Then he asked me afterwards, "'Yan o dahil sakaniya?" *sabay tingin kay toot* I think I said a bad word to him or something. LMAO.

But I was really trying to forget about him. Trying to stop thinking about him. But the sad truth is, I really can't do it. I guess I still love him. And nothing has changed. Everything is the same.

Despite the fact of many failures, despite those horrible happenings, I will stay happy and optimistic.

Maybe I'm just too strong. Therefore, I became weak.
But I will never call myself as a weak person. Because
even though I am, I still call myself as strong.

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Posted on Saturday, October 18, 2008 at 6:21 PM.
Just can't deal with it
I told myself "I just have to deal with it".

It's easy to tell yourself something you should do but it's pretty difficult to do it immediately. I mean, once you tell yourself.. For instance, you told yourself "I will not lie anymore, I won't ever!". But then, after a few seconds, you lie to yourself or someone else. Harsh eh? I know.

Although, sometimes I wish that once you tell yourself something you will do it and you can do it. But somehow, you just can't. It's sort of weird but yes, it's true.

Nowadays, I've been grumpy and pikon. Well, I'm going to be frank, I was pikon ever since. But I get so irritated easily these days. E.g., when I hear Dana's voice, I tend to be ranting all of a sudden. I don't know why. But it's just really annoying. Lol.

And nowadays, I can't deal with some stuff about me that is just wrong. Like when I have this mistake and I do it over and over again, I'm like "I want to die now! This life sucks blaah blah". EW! Emo much? ((: [PS ; NOT EMO!]

I can't accept the fact that I make mistakes. But for something that you've worked hard for, and it just not right, you have to do it all over again, won't you get pissed? Oh goodness. It makes me want to cry. But chyea, what can my tears do? NOTHING.

But I do know that everyone's not perfect. Everybody makes mistakes. Though there are times that I shout at myself and tell myself "Why can't I do it?! If they can, why can't I?!". Sucks! Maybe I'm just misunderstanding everything. Or maybe I just can't deal with the mistakes I made.

I've been emotional. (Hweh). Ella told me, "why are you emo?". First of all, not emo not emo not emo. Second, I have no idea. I guess because of what happened to me and you know who. But I swear, I'm still trying. Trying to forget all the good stuff. Trying to find a way out of this catastrophe.

Mkaaaay. Why the hell did I type all of these crap? :))
YAAAX. It's soo crappy. AHAHA. But whatever, na-type na e.
Fyi, I guess I just typed all of these because I got pissed of the thing we were doing in EPP hours ago. I mean wtf. It is so making my head explode. I hate stitching! Damn, it's so friggin' hard!

Oh well, reading this will just make you disappear. Kapish? Lmao.
I mean, wooo, go disappear! Right now, biatch! HAHA

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Posted on Wednesday, October 15, 2008 at 4:31 PM.
Shut up and let me go.
I'm trying to find a way out. Maybe there's a way out.

It has been two weeks and three days. It's not that long but it seems that we haven't talk since forever. You know this feeling, I know you know it. These past few days, I have been ignoring him. Possibly on purpose or probably I just don't want to. It's really hard for someone who knows that the person she loves doesn't love her anymore.

And the part that hurts is, you see him everyday. It's not that easy to see someone who broke your heart every single day. You can still feel the sadness and the depression. I mean, only a pyscho would move on that easily. Who can/would do such a thing? I guess I've moved on. But I call it "moved on" but I don't think I really did.

Every time I see his face, it makes me want to fall down and cry. I become vulnerable whenever I see him. I tend to be obnoxious if I see his body anywhere. Call that insanity, whatever. But I don't really get it. For me, what's happening now doesn't hurt that much. Well, everyone gets broken-hearted once in a while, right? Not only me. But everyone else.

Some people are truly heartbroken. Me? I don't call myself as a "heartbroken" person. After the last cry I had last October 11, I couldn't cry anymore. Maybe that's enough or I think too much sadness will kill me. I still want to live as a happy child, you know. Not a single guy can make me miserable. (Alright, maybe he can. But, not literally). I'm already in the misery and I cannot somehow get out of it. But I have acceptance. I understand what is happening. Even though I don't know the reason why he did this to me, or why he doesn't like me anymore, I can accept the fact that he won't even talk to me unlike before.

Unless, I did something bad or something wrong. Although, I can't remember anything that I've done wrong. I mean, why would a girl do such a thing to a boy that he loves? I have a point here. The bottom line is, I should not lose hope. I should not lose optimism. I'm not certain whether he likes me or not. But I assure you, I trust myself. I will think positive. I don't want to be like some girl there who is being so apathetic and too emotional. (Btw, I'm an anti-emo :p)

Sadness will not kill me. Try me. I laugh every time you see me. Ask them. They even see me laughing like a stupid li'l insane kid. I have a smile on my face even if I have been frustrated nowadays. It may be fake, but I have to tell you some thing. I must say, I am happy. Still happy. And will be happy everyday. Even if something bad happens, I will stay strong and I will never be weak.

No one can make me fall into pieces.

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Posted on Monday, October 13, 2008 at 1:43 PM.
Oh, confusion!
Hey! I'm confused. Frustrated, probably. Oh well. Whyy?

Someone is not talking to me. Ignoring me, in other words.
WHO? Someone very special. Guess! Guess!

Um. I guess some people know who I'm referring to and I think others don't. Ha! So unlucky. If you don't know what on earth I'm talking about. ((:

I don't really have an idea why this person's not talking to me. But pfft. I'm truly screwed. Well, that's what I feel. But I'm not certain if I am screwed. Whateverr.

At times, don't you just feel that you want to bring back the past? Sometimes do you want to have this power that can let you return to yesterday. I do. Don't you?

I have to say, I feel that way. I want to bring back those fun moments. Those precious memories.

I hate people who ignore me. Well, not hate. I guess I just get irritated whenever they don't even notice I'm there or they don't even care if I'm still alive. It's really annoying when you always ask about someone but he/she doesn't. They just don't care. Whether you're still alive or half dead.

I just wish that there would be this magical button that would let the person who won't even talk to you, realize how much you care about him/her. That she/he would know that you love him/her that much. MAN! IN MY DREAMS.

Sorry for this junk. Screw this blog! Screw this.

Clarisse is definitely confused. Ha! Thank you very much, folks.

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Posted on Wednesday, October 8, 2008 at 8:36 PM.
Randoooomness.
Hiya.

Today's Sunday. Which means, tomorrow's Monday. Oh, isn't it that obvious? >.<

So, Monday. For me, Monday's a bit boring. Or I call the boring day. How come? Because.. We don't have afternoon class/es during Mondays. And gr.4 peeps have their EPP/Computer so I guess there won't be any fun. Of course there would still be laughter. But not as fuun as Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays & Fridays.

Tuesdays are fun. 'Cause our lunch break's pretty long. 12:30pm 'til 2pm. And we practically do nothing during Computer time. So yeah, I guess it's fun. :D
Wednesdays are fun. Even though our lunch break's kinda short, it's fine. Bcos our dismissal's at 3:30pm. Afternoon session's recess. We can play and talk with them.

HA. Monday? Wala, boring.

JUST WANTED TO POST SOMETHING PARA MAY MAPOST NAMAN.
SORRY FOR THE WASTED TIME :))

And thanks for reading this, btw. :)

GOODBYE. :b

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Posted on Sunday, October 5, 2008 at 7:41 PM.
Just a silly post.
Well, hey there. I haven't posted since blahh.

My grades went well. I think I'm "contented". Okay, maybe I'm not. I really think that my grades are great. Although, I do need some improvements. Kk, let's not talk about school stuff. I wanna talk 'bout the cool things. May I? :D [well, of course I can, the blog's mine in the first place] ((:

Um. These days, I had my "bad" days. I had my ankle sprain last week. Another sugat on the knee. All from.. Ayt, you guess. ROBBER! I guess I call myself as a robber addict. I mean, whatever. I don't care if I have sprains and bruises. I care about the people and the game. (:

Well, I love robber. And I'm a tough girl. So, who cares about those bruises? I guess some girls care. But for Clarisse? Nahh.

I don't care what they say/tell about me. Those rumors and fake stories. WTH! It ain't true, so why should I whine? I just keep on sucking it up. LOL.

I'm completely different. Not half, not one-third, but COMPLETE! Whole. Unlike those other girls who are picky and trying hard. Those perfectionists here and there. Haha. Well, before, I can say, I am picky or trying hard. But now, I'm different, I guess so.

Just so you know, I'm different from her. I'm not shy. I'm talkative. I'm the reason he smiles. Awwwe.

Don't compare me to some girl out there. Because I ain't her.

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Posted on Saturday, October 4, 2008 at 8:04 PM.
Matapang naman ah.
"Ang galing mo, Clarisse!!"
--
Rafael Fontanilla

"Dana, Idol mo ba ako?"
Dana's response:
"Oo!" [sabay turo sa sugat ko]

"Ella, Idol mo ba ako?"
Ella's response:
"Syempre! Ikaw pa!"

"Alam mo Clare, idol kita. Kahit anong mangyari sayo, ganyan ka pa rin!"
"Thanks, Clare
! Thanks for giving me advises."
-- Tiffany Abcede

"Matapang ka naman ah. Nakayanan mo yung sugat mo kanina."
-- Paolo Ang

"Bakit.. Si _____ nasusugatan?"
Ken's response: "Hindi."
"Kita mo! Kasi iba ako!"

"Basta. The best ka!"
-- Hensen Espinoza

"Ay. Idol kitaa! Ang tapang moo"
-- Raizel Ignacio

"Matapang 'yong babae!"
-- A random Gr.4 student. [while playing robber]

And many more.

Well. I take all the risks no matter what. Lumalaban ako. If I give up easily, then what will happen? What do you think? Nothing! Nothing will happen to you if you won't bust a move. If you're going to be vulnerable forever, what will you be? You will be nobody. Especially when you're inspired, madali na 'yan. Just be strong. Be courageous once in a while.

Wala lang. Natutuwa lang ako sa mga sinasabi nila. And a lot of thanks to them. I love you all! Always stay courageous. :-*

P.S. "Malayo 'yan sa bituka!" ((:

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Posted on Wednesday, October 1, 2008 at 10:41 AM.